Can you think of a time when comparison left you feeling a little insecure — maybe even when things were going fine a moment before?
A few years ago, the women in my neighborhood started hosting rotating happy hours — casual get‑togethers meant to help us connect and build community. They were lovely evenings, full of laughter and conversation.
I remember walking into those homes, admiring the beautiful decor, and thinking how warm and pulled‑together everything felt. And, almost instantly, another thought would follow: My house doesn’t look like this.
The funny thing is, that thought was both true and unfair. I hadn’t spent time or money on decorating — partly because I don’t enjoy home improvement projects. Still, that didn’t stop me from slipping into comparison mode.
My neighbors’ effort and style somehow made me question my own space, even though it had nothing to do with what those gatherings were really about — friendship and belonging.
That’s the sneaky nature of social comparison. It’s completely human — our brains are wired to measure where we stand — but we rarely make fair comparisons.
We focus on someone else’s strengths next to our own struggles, forgetting that everyone has challenges we don’t see. Over time, that habit can chip away at our appreciation for the good that’s already in our lives.
Gratitude offers a gentle reset. When we pause to notice what’s working, what’s beautiful, and what brings a smile, we shift from measuring to appreciating.
This final week of the series, I want to focus on how to notice what’s working while we strive towards a new, improved future.
Appreciating the Present While Building What’s Next
One of my clients recently found herself facing a big unknown. She works in a field where AI is beginning to change the landscape and realized her role might eventually be replaced.
Understandably, she felt anxious and uncertain about what would come next. The thought of reinventing her career felt huge — especially since she had never really stopped to consider what she truly wanted from her work or what mattered most to her.
During our first coaching session, she was nervous about doing the inner work of career exploration, even though she sensed that’s where she needed to start.
Once we began exploring her character strengths and values — through assessments, journaling prompts, and creative thought experiments (like imagining I had a magic wand and could design her ideal job and work environment) — something shifted.
The process she’d feared began to feel energizing and even fun.
She started to see this career transition not as a setback, but as an opportunity to align her future work with what gives her life meaning. At the same time, she began to feel a deep appreciation for her present circumstances — a job she still enjoys that gives her stability and space to explore her next steps.
That sense of gratitude is helping her stay grounded and hopeful about what’s ahead.
Her story is a great reminder that gratitude doesn’t mean settling. It’s what allows us to move forward from a place of peace instead of pressure — appreciating the beauty of where we are while building what comes next.
Try These Exercises for a Happier, Grounded Life
Appreciate What’s Already Good (Even Before Change)
Pause to notice what is working in your life right now—relationships, routines, strengths, resources, or moments of beauty.
Let yourself feel grateful for these things without insisting that everything else be perfect first.
Remember: appreciating the present doesn’t mean giving up on change — it gives you a steadier foundation to grow from.
Practice “Vision and Appreciation” in Real Life
Try a simple daily check-in: “One step toward my vision” and “One thing I appreciate about today.”
Share your goals and small wins with someone who can help you see and celebrate progress you might overlook yourself.
Encourage a kinder inner voice: shifting from “I’m so behind” to “I’m in progress, and there is good here already.” Sticky notes with meaningful phrases where you’ll see them can be a helpful reminder.
Make Room for Moments of Joy and Laughter
Just like a marathon runner needs water along the route, we need moments of lightness to sustain us on our path toward change.
Laughter, play, and small bursts of fun refill our energy and remind us why life is worth improving in the first place.
If you notice those moments are missing, create them — call a friend who makes you laugh, watch a favorite comedy, or take a spontaneous detour toward something that delights you.
These moments aren’t distractions from growth — they’re fuel for it.
This Week’s Challenge
I’d love to hear from you!
- What is one thing in your life today that you are deeply grateful for, even as you hope for change?
Leave me a comment and join the conversation!
Need Support Shifting Your Story?
If you’d like help balancing future goals with present-moment appreciation, email me at dianna@collierclan.net for a free consultation.
Dianna Collier 