Dianna Collier

A Different Way Through Low‑Motivation Days

Have you ever had a day when your goals looked right, but your energy and motivation just didn’t show up to meet them?

That’s how I felt yesterday as I tried to generate ideas for this newsletter and came up with…nothing.

No spark, no clear topic, just pressure because I had a call coming up with a collaborator who’s often my sounding board for ideas. I felt like I “should” have several possible ideas to bring so I could get valuable feedback.

I tried to find a solution by picking up a book on the science of motivation that I’ve been meaning to read. It was interesting and engaging, and I even landed on a section about setting inspiring goals.

But as I read it, I had this quiet realization: “This isn’t actually my problem.” I was trying to think my way out of a feeling.

My problem wasn’t how to set better goals.
My problem was that I was trying to override my humanity.

When thinking your way out doesn’t work

I still didn’t have a brilliant idea or a big a‑ha by the time my call started.

When it was my turn to share, I decided to be honest and just tell the truth. I was struggling to find inspiration and was feeling uncertain if I could write something meaningful for my readers.

As I talked it through, I noticed a shift. I realized I didn’t actually need to push myself harder. I needed to give myself permission to be human.

No decision was required right then. I wasn’t planning to write until the next day anyway. I could let this be an in‑between space: a little uncomfortable, a little cloudy, and still totally okay.

I could feel the discomfort without fighting it. I could trust that if I listened to my feelings instead of wrestling them to the ground, they would shift. The negativity would ease. My motivation would find its way back.

Outside, it was literally cloudy. Inside, it felt the same. Talking with my friend helped me pull back and see the bigger picture: maybe there was a good reason I felt so uninspired.

Turning curiosity onto myself

Once I softened a bit, I could finally ask a different question:

“Is there a good reason I’m feeling this way?”

It didn’t take long to find one. Actually, several.

My dog just had surgery last week to remove cancer. She’s doing well (thank goodness), but caretaking has been using a lot of my energy and attention.

My schedule has been all over the place. Meetings rescheduled because people were sick or dealing with personal stuff. Rearranging medical appointments for myself.

With Valentine’s Day and President’s Day, I’ve been coaching less than usual.

And I know this about myself: I get a lot of inspiration from people. Fewer sessions and conversations = less energy and creative spark.

So yes, technically, I had more time to write. But I had less energy. And that matters.

Once I saw all of that laid out, my lack of motivation made complete sense.
There was nothing wrong with me. My system was just doing its best with the load it was carrying.

When I name that for clients, they often feel relief. When I finally named it for myself, I felt the same thing.

What was really under the “low motivation”

Underneath it all, what I was actually feeling was disappointment and frustration.

Disappointment that my week didn’t go as planned.

Frustration that I wasn’t using my “extra time” in the way I thought I “should.”

Worry that if I didn’t stay productive, things might stall out.

Those feelings were quietly fueling my lack of motivation, the way they so often do for the clients I talk to.

From the outside it can look like procrastination, laziness, or “I just can’t get myself going.”

From the inside, it’s often: “I’m tired. I’m worried. This is not the week I thought I’d have.”

The problem wasn’t that I’m not driven or dedicated enough. The problem was that I was expecting myself to show up as if nothing hard was happening.

You don’t have to be “on” all the time

Our culture sends a loud message: stay goal‑driven, stay motivated, keep optimizing.

But we are not machines. We are not designed to be inspired and productive at a constant, steady clip.

Some weeks are full of momentum and clarity. Other weeks are full of caretaking, disrupted plans, medical updates, or just…life.

You don’t have to be goal‑driven and motivated all the time to be a responsible, caring, ambitious person.

You’re allowed to have cloudy stretches. You’re allowed to be affected by what’s happening in your world.

Ironically, the research on self‑compassion and motivation suggests that being kinder to ourselves when we struggle actually helps us re‑engage more fully over time, not less.

In my experience—personally and with clients—that rings true:

Compassion loosens the stuckness that criticism hardens.

I didn’t get my motivation back by reading the perfect tip or constructing the perfect goal.

I got it back by:

telling the truth to someone I trust, sharing some laughter & deep discussion,

looking honestly at what I was carrying, and

letting myself be a human being for a minute.

A few gentle questions for you

If you’ve been feeling unmotivated lately, here are a few questions you might try:

What feelings are fueling my lack of motivation? No judgement, just acknowledgement.

Instead of “What’s wrong with me?”, ask: “What’s been going on in my life that might explain why I feel this way?”

If I treated myself as a human being, not a human doing, what would today look like?

Given that, what would a kind, realistic next step look like?”

This Week’s Challenge

I’d love to hear from you!

How do you support yourself on days when your motivation is low?

Leave me a comment and join the conversation!

Need Support Developing Self-Kindness?

If you’d like personalized strategies to increase self-compassion, email me at dianna@collierclan.net for a free consultation.

What to Do When You Feel Powerless (Without Burning Out)

Can you remember a time when you desperately wanted to help — to ease someone’s pain, change a situation, or make things right — but found that you couldn’t?

Maybe it was a loved one going through something hard, or a larger problem in the world that felt too big to touch. That ache, the space between our care and our control, is what we often label helplessness or powerlessness.

Helplessness can stir frustration, guilt, or even shame, especially for those of us who naturally jump into action. But feeling powerless doesn’t mean we’ve failed; it means we’re human.

When we meet our helplessness with understanding rather than judgment, we steady ourselves. We create room to breathe, soothe, and respond with clarity instead of panic.

I was reminded of this truth in a very personal way this past week.

When Parenting Meets Powerlessness

My husband and I had just spent a nice weekend visiting our two daughters at their college when one of my daughters started feeling sick. Our Airbnb rental was over, and with our dog in tow, we couldn’t extend our stay.

After we left, her symptoms worsened — fever, nausea, full-on flu-like misery — and we coached her from afar on finding medical care, handling new insurance at the pharmacy, and choosing gentle foods.

Just as our first daughter’s illness worsened, our other daughter became sick too. In the middle of the night, she called for the first time ever in real distress, frightened by intense stomach symptoms and unsure if she needed the ER.

Every instinct in me wanted to jump in the car, drive back to campus, and do what I used to do when they were at home: drive them to appointments, clean up, pick up medication, and sit nearby to comfort them. Instead, all I could offer were words over the phone.

The feelings of helplessness ran deep. My mind swirled: What if they need more care? What if I’m not doing enough? These moments became a practice ground for self-compassion.

I started using self-compassion breaks when my emotions ran high. I paused with my hands over my heart & said to myself:

This is really hard. I’m feeling helpless & worried. This situation is frustrating.

All people experience pain sometimes. Many parents feel this way when their kids are sick. I am not alone. It’s likely there are even parents right now feeling like I do.

You are doing the best you can. Some things are out of your control. Although it’s hard, your daughters are capable of managing this without you there. They can feel your love from a distance.

I also did a self-care check-in using the SPIRE model of well-being to ask what I needed at this moment. Practically, that meant getting enough sleep, moving my body, eating well, and reaching out to a few trusted mom friends for reassurance and perspective.

Caring for Yourself When You Feel Helpless

You’ve seen how I used a self-compassion break and a SPIRE check-in when my daughters were sick. Here’s how you can try these same practices when you’re feeling helpless.

How to Do a Self-Compassion Break

A self-compassion break is a short pause where you turn toward your pain with kindness instead of criticism. It has three simple steps:

Notice and name that you are in pain without judgement. You have to be mindful of pain to work with it.

“This is really hard.”
“This hurts.”
“I’m feeling scared and helpless right now.”

Remind yourself that suffering is part of being human. This step eases the sense of isolation that often comes with helplessness and reconnects you to common humanity.

“Suffering is a part of life.”
“All people feel powerless sometimes.”
“You are not alone. Although the cause of the pain may differ, there are people feeling pain right now.”

Offer yourself kind words & gestures. If you are struggling to find compassionate words, consider what you would say to a good friend in the same situation.
- “I’m doing the best I can with what I have.”
- “Some things are out of my control, and that doesn’t mean I don’t care.”
- “May I give myself the kindness I need right now.”

When you feel helpless, a self-compassion break can calm your nervous system enough to think more clearly, make decisions more wisely, and stay emotionally present—rather than getting swept away by anxiety or shame.

How to Do a SPIRE Check-In

The SPIRE model invites you to look at your well-being from five angles: Spiritual, Physical, Intellectual, Relational, and Emotional. A quick check-in helps you notice what might support you when things feel out of control.

You can simply ask yourself:

Spiritual: What would help me feel connected to something larger than this moment—meaning, values, faith, or purpose? (Examples: a few deep breaths, a short prayer, a moment in nature.)

Physical: What does my body need right now? (Examples: sleep, water, nourishing food, a short walk, stretching, medication, rest.)

Intellectual: What kind of learning would support me? How can I open to new experiences? (Examples: using curiosity to explore a topic, finding the lessons hidden in everyday moments.)

Relational: Who can I reach out to for support or connection? How can I cultivate a healthy relationship with myself? (Examples: texting a friend, joining a supportive community or group, practicing self-compassion.)

Emotional: How can I make space for my feelings and reach towards resilience? (Examples: naming your emotions, journaling, practicing gratitude, doing a fun activity.)

You don’t have to “fix” all five areas. Often, choosing one or two small actions—like going to bed earlier, taking a short walk, or calling a trusted friend—can make a surprising difference in how held and resourced you feel.

This Week’s Challenge

I’d love to hear from you!

What’s one small action you can take to care for yourself when you feel powerless to change a situation?

Leave me a comment and join the conversation!

Need Support With Your Self-Care?

If you’d like personalized strategies on developing self-care, email me at dianna@collierclan.net for a free consultation.

How to Stop Comparison from Stealing Your Joy

Can you think of a time when comparison left you feeling a little insecure — maybe even when things were going fine a moment before?

A few years ago, the women in my neighborhood started hosting rotating happy hours — casual get‑togethers meant to help us connect and build community. They were lovely evenings, full of laughter and conversation.

I remember walking into those homes, admiring the beautiful decor, and thinking how warm and pulled‑together everything felt. And, almost instantly, another thought would follow: My house doesn’t look like this.

The funny thing is, that thought was both true and unfair. I hadn’t spent time or money on decorating — partly because I don’t enjoy home improvement projects. Still, that didn’t stop me from slipping into comparison mode.

My neighbors’ effort and style somehow made me question my own space, even though it had nothing to do with what those gatherings were really about — friendship and belonging.

That’s the sneaky nature of social comparison. It’s completely human — our brains are wired to measure where we stand — but we rarely make fair comparisons.

We focus on someone else’s strengths next to our own struggles, forgetting that everyone has challenges we don’t see. Over time, that habit can chip away at our appreciation for the good that’s already in our lives.

Gratitude offers a gentle reset. When we pause to notice what’s working, what’s beautiful, and what brings a smile, we shift from measuring to appreciating.

This final week of the series, I want to focus on how to notice what’s working while we strive towards a new, improved future.

Appreciating the Present While Building What’s Next

One of my clients recently found herself facing a big unknown. She works in a field where AI is beginning to change the landscape and realized her role might eventually be replaced.

Understandably, she felt anxious and uncertain about what would come next. The thought of reinventing her career felt huge — especially since she had never really stopped to consider what she truly wanted from her work or what mattered most to her.

During our first coaching session, she was nervous about doing the inner work of career exploration, even though she sensed that’s where she needed to start.

Once we began exploring her character strengths and values — through assessments, journaling prompts, and creative thought experiments (like imagining I had a magic wand and could design her ideal job and work environment) — something shifted.

The process she’d feared began to feel energizing and even fun.

She started to see this career transition not as a setback, but as an opportunity to align her future work with what gives her life meaning. At the same time, she began to feel a deep appreciation for her present circumstances — a job she still enjoys that gives her stability and space to explore her next steps.

That sense of gratitude is helping her stay grounded and hopeful about what’s ahead.

Her story is a great reminder that gratitude doesn’t mean settling. It’s what allows us to move forward from a place of peace instead of pressure — appreciating the beauty of where we are while building what comes next.

Try These Exercises for a Happier, Grounded Life

Appreciate What’s Already Good (Even Before Change)

Pause to notice what is working in your life right now—relationships, routines, strengths, resources, or moments of beauty.

Let yourself feel grateful for these things without insisting that everything else be perfect first.

Remember: appreciating the present doesn’t mean giving up on change — it gives you a steadier foundation to grow from.

Practice “Vision and Appreciation” in Real Life

Try a simple daily check-in: “One step toward my vision” and “One thing I appreciate about today.”

Share your goals and small wins with someone who can help you see and celebrate progress you might overlook yourself.

Encourage a kinder inner voice: shifting from “I’m so behind” to “I’m in progress, and there is good here already.” Sticky notes with meaningful phrases where you’ll see them can be a helpful reminder.

Make Room for Moments of Joy and Laughter

Just like a marathon runner needs water along the route, we need moments of lightness to sustain us on our path toward change.

Laughter, play, and small bursts of fun refill our energy and remind us why life is worth improving in the first place.

If you notice those moments are missing, create them — call a friend who makes you laugh, watch a favorite comedy, or take a spontaneous detour toward something that delights you.

These moments aren’t distractions from growth — they’re fuel for it.

This Week’s Challenge

I’d love to hear from you!

What is one thing in your life today that you are deeply grateful for, even as you hope for change?

Leave me a comment and join the conversation!

Need Support Shifting Your Story?

If you’d like help balancing future goals with present-moment appreciation, email me at dianna@collierclan.net for a free consultation.

Proof You’re Moving Forward: How to See Progress When It Feels Invisible

How would you describe yourself these days? Has that answer stayed the same, or has it been shifting?

Every day, we’re gathering evidence about who we think we are—often without realizing it. We form opinions about ourselves the same way we form them about others, by watching our actions.

If you notice someone acting kindly, you naturally think of them as kind. When you notice yourself acting with persistence, curiosity, or care, your self-image adjusts to include those qualities.

One small, intentional step can change how we see ourselves, and that’s where a hopeful vision for the future begins to feel believable.

This week’s focus is on noticing and naming those kinds of steps in your own life. As you pay attention to what you are already doing—sending the email, taking the class, making the call—you’re not just moving toward a future you hope for; you’re steadily shaping the way you see yourself right now.

What kind of evidence have you been quietly collecting about who you are becoming?

Changing Your Story, One Step at a Time

One former client who dreamed of becoming a published author didn’t wait until she secured a book deal to call herself a writer; she wrote regularly, connected with other writers, finished a full draft of a novel, and is now revising it while drafting a second one.

With each step, “someone who wishes she could write” quietly became “someone who is a writer.”

Another client is reshaping his work identity by talking directly with people in the new fields he’s considering. Instead of researching alone and guessing from job descriptions, he schedules informational interviews, asks specific questions about day‑to‑day work, and follows up to keep those relationships warm.

Each conversation not only clarifies which paths fit him best, it also reinforces a new story: he is someone who can reach out, build connections, and actively guide his own career transition.

How to Notice (and Name) the Small Steps

Progress rarely arrives all at once. It unfolds through small, steady efforts that don’t always feel like much in the moment—but they’re the very proof that growth is happening. When we pause to notice what’s working, we strengthen our confidence and capacity for hope. Take these steps to create proof that you are moving forward:

Count every action that moves your life in a helpful direction: emails sent, conversations started, classes researched, rest that restored you.

At the end of the day or week, document three concrete things you did that support your longer-term goals.

When your inner critic says “nothing is happening,” read that list to remind yourself that progress is actually in motion.

Celebrate the small successes along the way—anything from telling a friend about your win to treating yourself to a special dinner out.

This Week’s Challenge

I’d love to hear from you!

How are you celebrating a small success on the way to a bigger goal? If you’re not sure, leave me a comment and share what you’ve been up to—I’ll help you spot and celebrate the wins with you.

Need Support Shifting Your Story?

If you’d like help balancing future goals with present-moment appreciation, email me at dianna@collierclan.net for a free consultation.

How to Make Peace With “In Progress”

As I’ve been checking in with clients after the holiday break, I’ve noticed a common theme: a focus on what they haven’t achieved yet.

Several clients shared that they didn’t complete the tasks they’d carefully planned—often for very understandable reasons: family needs took over, motivation dipped, or others simply didn’t respond as hoped.

On paper, those “unfinished” items looked like a lack of progress. Cue the familiar inner critic: “I should be further along by now.”

For others, the situation looked almost the opposite. They’d made meaningful progress—gaining new clients, reaching out to contacts, enrolling in a class, or exploring new career ideas—but they barely noticed their own momentum.

Instead of celebrating what had happened, they zeroed in on what was still undone: the job not yet landed, the unclear next career, the business not yet at its ideal size, the complicated return to work after caregiving.

Different paths, same underlying story: “It’s not enough yet.”

This new three-part series will focus on gently shifting that story—learning how to hold a hopeful vision for the future while appreciating the good that’s already here, even when you’re not yet where you want to be.

Goals Take Time (and That’s Not Failure)

Big, meaningful transitions—like a career change, growing a business, or returning to work after caregiving—rarely unfold in one big leap. They come in stages, with pauses, experiments, and the occasional detour.

Our brains are wired to fixate on the “gap” (what’s missing) rather than the “gain” (how far we’ve come), which can easily feed frustration and self-criticism.

When you notice that happening, try a gentle reframe: “Not there yet” doesn’t mean “not moving” or “not worthy.” It simply means you’re in the middle of the meaningful work that growth requires.

Hold a Kind, Clear Vision

One way to stop fixating on the “gap” is to hold a kind and clear vision of where you want to go.

Make sure your destination is well-defined. Big goals can feel out of reach when we don’t know what “success” looks or feels like. Without clarity, it’s hard to recognize progress—much less celebrate it.

Keep your vision flexible. Let it guide your choices, not box you in. For example:

“I want to find meaningful paid work that allows me to use my strengths.”
is much gentler and more motivating than
“I need to decide on a new career path this week.”

Defining a clear vision can be challenging for some people. If you’d like help defining your destination, try this quick exercise.

Let your vision serve as a compass—not a measuring stick to beat yourself up with—and allow it to evolve as you learn more about yourself.

This Week’s Challenge

I’d love to hear from you!

What is one small sign that you are already moving toward your vision?

Leave me a comment and join the conversation!

Need Support Shifting Your Story?

If you’d like help balancing future goals with present-moment appreciation, email me at dianna@collierclan.net for a free consultation.

Slow to Start 2026? How to Find Your Inspiration

I wish I could tell you that I started 2026 with my goals neatly mapped out, motivating words to guide the year, and a beautiful vision board hanging above my desk.

But the truth? I’ve been feeling a bit unmotivated.

My energy is scattered. Coaching sessions with clients still light me up, yet when it comes to business planning and goal-setting, I keep finding reasons to procrastinate.

One of my favorite yoga teachers recently reminded me that this season is about rebuilding predictability. Over the holidays, most of us shifted our routines—sleep, meals, movement, social time, even screen time.

As we settle back into structure, our nervous systems need space to recalibrate. With time, our energy catches up, and the desire to re-engage with the new year returns naturally.

I love this self-compassionate perspective and have been re-engaging with my routines and anchoring practices (worth a read for good habits). Still, I’ve been wondering where to find inspiration for the months ahead.

In positive psychology, one of the core principles is to look at what’s worked well in the past to help guide our future focus. So, I’ve been reflecting on what truly inspired me in 2025.

My Top Sources of Inspiration from 2025
(And Ideas to Make Your 2026 Exciting)

When I look back on what inspired me most last year, two main sources stand out— the arts and the people around me.

1. The Arts (The Wiser Sources)

I find so much meaning in the words and ideas of others—whether it’s a song lyric, a quote, or a short poem that lands at just the right moment.

One phrase that stayed with me all year was something a friend shared from their therapist:

“It’s scary, but it isn’t dangerous.”

That reminder has helped me take small but brave steps outside my comfort zone — like recording a short video to share online. Each time I repeat the phrase, I feel a little more grounded and a little less afraid.

Another quote that inspired both my writing and coaching this year comes from author James Clear:

“In theory, consistency is about being disciplined, determined, and unwavering.

In practice, consistency is about being adaptable. Don’t have much time? Scale it down. Don’t have much energy? Do the easy version. Find different ways to show up depending on the circumstances. Let your habits change shape to meet the demands of the day.

Adaptability is the way of consistency.”

This perspective reframed how I think about habits and motivation. It gave me permission to flex with real life rather than feel discouraged when things didn’t go exactly as planned.

2. The People Around Me (My Firestarters)

The other big source of inspiration in 2025 came from the people in my orbit—especially the friends and colleagues I’ve met through coaching.

When I’ve felt stuck or uncertain, partnering with others has sparked creativity and momentum.

Sometimes that support looked like receiving coaching myself; other times it came through collaboration—co-creating a workshop, brainstorming new business ideas, acting as a sounding board for writing topics, or simply making everyday tasks more fun.

And, of course, my clients have been a constant source of inspiration. Watching them step courageously outside their comfort zones reminds me why this work matters—and often nudges me to do the same.

Questions to Spark Your Own Inspiration

When have you felt most engaged, creative, or alive? What were you doing?

What moments, experiences, or people lifted your energy last year?

Which quotes, songs, books, or pieces of art have stayed with you—and why?

Who in your life inspires you to grow or take brave steps?

How might you bring a little more of those uplifting moments, people, or ideas into your everyday life this year?

This Week’s Challenge

I’d love to hear from you!

What inspired you this past year? Where might you find inspiration for the coming year?

Leave me a comment and join the conversation!

Need Support to get 2026 off to a great start?

If you’d like help reconnecting with your own inspiration for the New Year, email me at dianna@collierclan.net for a free consultation.

Holiday Stress Relief: 7 Ways to Find Beauty

I find beauty in strange places.

Today, as I write on a foggy gray afternoon, the view outside my window is… less than inspiring. But then my eyes land on the Kleenex box on my desk — cheerful snowy houses, bright evergreens, and tiny wreaths perched above the doors — and suddenly, I feel a flicker of delight.

This ridiculous fondness for cute tissue boxes has become a bit of a running joke in my family. Still, I’m genuinely grateful that something so ordinary can lift my mood and remind me that beauty doesn’t have to be grand or obvious to matter.

Of course, I’m also moved by the more traditional kinds of beauty — like the music from my daughters’ Christmas concert last week. The handbells, orchestra, and choir really kindled my holiday spirit, along with the joy of seeing my girls perform.

And it’s not just a nice feeling. Research suggests that appreciating beauty activates parts of the brain linked to pleasure, calm, and connection. It can lower stress hormones, steady our heart rate, and even boost resilience by helping us focus on what’s good and meaningful.

In other words, taking in a bit of beauty — whether it’s art, nature, or a well-designed Kleenex box — can help restore both our mood and our sense of balance during a busy season.

This week’s tool in the Peace & Positivity for the Holidays series is appreciating and creating beauty in the world around us.

7 Ways to Find Beauty During the Holiday Season

Take a Beauty Walk (or Drive)
Be intentional about noticing the beauty of nature- look at the snowflakes if you’re in a place with snow or the colored leaves on the trees (like here in Texas.) Admire the beauty created by humans through holiday decorations.

Capture Moments of Light
Take photos of small, lovely things — morning frost, a reflection on the window, string lights at dusk. Noticing through a lens helps train your eyes toward appreciation. This could even be a part of your Beauty Walk.

Appreciate Musical Excellence
Attend a musical performance or listen deeply to a song you love. Notice the lyrics, rhythm, harmonies, or instrumental skill.

Revisit Holiday Memories
Flip through old photos, ornaments, or cards that recall meaningful moments. A friend of mine loves watching the Charlie Brown Christmas special every year. Emotional beauty can be just as powerful as what you see outside.

Share Beauty with Others
Send a short message, poem, or image to someone who could use a lift. Spreading beauty amplifies its impact on both giver and receiver.

Find Beauty in Meaningful Rituals
Whether it’s lighting a candle at dusk, saying a familiar prayer, singing sacred music, or observing a cherished practice that connects you with something larger than yourself, rituals offer rich opportunities to experience beauty.

Pause for Stillness
Sometimes beauty reveals itself when we stop rushing. Give yourself a quiet minute — maybe with a cup of tea — to simply look around.

This Week’s Challenge

I’d love to hear from you!

Where are you finding beauty during this holiday season? How can you create a little if it’s not readily available?

Leave me a comment and join the conversation!

Need Support?

If you’d like personalized strategies for peace and positivity this holiday season, email me at dianna@collierclan.net for a free consultation.

Holiday Burnout? 5 Playful Practices to Help

This time of year asks a lot of us. As the days grow shorter and the light fades earlier and earlier, many people notice their energy dip and their mood flatten.

At the same time, calendars swell with obligations: work deadlines before year-end, school events, travel plans, family gatherings, gifts to choose, meals to prepare, and traditions to uphold.

Even when these activities are meaningful, the pressure to make everything “special” or “just right” can quietly pile up, leaving nervous systems on high alert and bodies running on fumes.

When life starts to feel like one long checklist, what often goes missing is a sense of lightness. This is where the third tool in the Peace & Positivity for the Holidays series comes in: playfulness.

When people give themselves permission to be a little more playful—through small moments of silliness, creativity, or joy—it can lower stress, ease the intensity of worry, and create tiny pockets of relief in a crowded day.

Research links a playful outlook with stronger coping skills, more frequent positive emotions, and a greater sense of life satisfaction, even when circumstances are challenging.

So, join me in experimenting with where a little bit of play—small, simple moments of fun or silliness—might slip into your days and bring a lighter feel to this season.

5 Playful Practices to Ease Holiday Stress

Revisit how you played as a child

What did “fun” look like for you—dancing, drawing, singing, building, playing sports, being outside?

Try a grown-up version now: dance in your kitchen, reread a beloved holiday book, decorate cookies “just because,” or revive a favorite tradition like driving around to look at lights.

Find a play role model

Kids and pets are basically professional play consultants. Let them remind you how to be in the moment and follow their lead in games, crafts, baking, or silly made-up activities.

Notice playful adults too—the friend with outrageous holiday socks, the coworker who always has a new game, the relative who loves a goofy tradition—and borrow their ideas.

Make up funny stories to entertain yourself

Long lines and traffic jams are perfect places to let your imagination wander. Turn waiting time into story time: imagine who the person in front of you is shopping for or where the driver ahead of you is going.

If you’re with someone else, build the story together and see how over-the-top you can make it. If you’re solo, text a friend your silliest version (“I’m pretty sure the person in front of me is buying that blender for a secret spy mission”) and share the laugh.

Take tiny play breaks during the day

Instead of waiting for a big chunk of free time, look for 5–15 minute pockets where you can do something light and fun. You might film a silly video, dance & sing to a favorite song or doodle on a sticky note between tasks.

You can also play with what’s around you: snap photos of outlandish shoes or sweaters in stores and send them to a friend or one of your kids with a message like, “Found your holiday outfit!” This is a favorite of mine.

These small, silly moments can release tension and reset your mood.

Use games to connect

When you are with family or friends, suggesting a board game, card game, or simple group game can create shared laughter and ease conversation pressure.

Depending on your group, that might look like a cozy puzzle night, a round of charades, a casual game of catch, or an online game you can all join from different locations.

This Week’s Challenge

I’d love to hear from you!

How will you embrace playfulness this holiday season?

Leave me a comment and join the conversation!

Need Support?

If you’d like personalized strategies for peace and positivity this holiday season, email me at dianna@collierclan.net for a free consultation.

Gratitude Practices For Grumpy People

As Thanksgiving approaches, the annual wave of gratitude messages is hard to miss. You might feel nudged to dust off your gratitude journal, or simply go around the table naming something you’re thankful for.

If these rituals genuinely warm your heart, wonderful—keep them.

But if the “be grateful!” chorus leaves you annoyed, numb, or pressured, you are not alone. Gratitude can start to feel performative or shallow when it’s treated like a seasonal obligation.

Honestly, that used to be me. I was definitely a gratitude grump.

Yet something shifted when gratitude became less about forcing myself to “look on the bright side,” and more about noticing everyday moments of goodness. Over time, appreciation for the ordinary, imperfect good in my life began to come more naturally—and with it, a bit more peace.

The beauty of gratitude is that there are countless ways in. There’s truly a version of it for everyone.

Simple practices have been linked with lower stress, better sleep, and a more grounded outlook—benefits that are especially welcome during the holiday swirl.

Still, even with the best intentions, gratitude practices can lose their spark. If you get bored or start to feel flat, mixing things up can help bring back that positive mood boost.

This week’s tool in the Peace & Positivity During the Holidays series is gratitude—not the polished, pressure-filled version, but a kinder, more flexible approach you can explore in your own way.

Whether you adore gratitude rituals or view them with a little suspicion, consider this a gentle invitation: experiment with what authentic appreciation might look like for you, right now.

5 Unique Gratitude Practices to Try

3 Good Things:
At the end of the day, write down three good things that happened.
Be specific: What happened? How did it feel? Was anyone else involved? What did you do to help make each of these things happen?

Savoring Smells of the Season:
Spend the day noticing the pleasant smells around you.
Is it fresh brewed coffee? Peppermint? Bread baking in the oven?
Which scents are especially appealing?
Whenever you notice a good scent, pause and take three deep breaths to enjoy it.
Try jotting your favorites in a journal or in your phone’s notes app. Review and reflect on them at the day’s end.

Self-Gratitude:
We usually think of gratitude as something we give others, but it can be powerful to turn it inward.
What do you appreciate about yourself—your strengths, skills, or personality?
What physical abilities are you thankful to have?
What have you done to take care of yourself today?

Appreciating Humor:
Notice what brings a smile or makes you laugh throughout your day.
Who made you laugh or smile today?
What funny images or jokes did you enjoy?
Did you watch any funny reels, movies, or TV shows?
Collect moments of humor in a journal or online folder to revisit whenever you need a pick-me-up.

Appreciating Your Home:
Try this practice when you’re tired and finally back at home.
What aspects of your living space bring you pleasure?
What comforts does your home provide?
Are there sights, sounds, or bits of natural beauty nearby that you enjoy?
Which sounds in your environment feel soothing?

This Week’s Challenge

I’d love to hear from you!

What are you grateful for?

Leave me a comment and join the conversation!

Next Week

I’ll be taking off a week from the newsletter to celebrate Thanksgiving. Check out my blog, Shift Your Mood With Gratitude, for more ways to weave gratitude into your daily life.

Need Support?

If you’d like personalized strategies for peace and positivity this holiday season, email me at dianna@collierclan.net for a free consultation.

Manage Holiday Overwhelm — Finding Calm With Anchors

While the holiday season often brings moments of joy and togetherness, it can just as easily be a time of stress and emotional complexity.

Many of us feel the pressure of packed schedules, financial worries, or the drive to create picture-perfect gatherings.

Sometimes, the expectation to be cheerful feels out of reach—especially when coping with changes in relationships, loneliness, or the bittersweet absence of loved ones who have passed away.

If you’re juggling a lot, wrestling with tricky family dynamics, or just missing someone this year, know you’re not alone.

The holidays can stir up a wide range of emotions, and acknowledging them is an important step toward well-being.

This series will offer uplifting ideas and practical tools to nurture peace and positivity, supporting you through the challenges and joys the season will bring.

This week’s practice is all about finding your anchors—those reliable sources of calm and steadiness you can return to, even when the holiday season feels hectic or overwhelming.

Riding Out the Holiday Storm: My Go-To Anchors

This year, the holiday overwhelm hit me as soon as I glanced at my end-of-year calendar. The anticipation of packed commitments, crowded stores, tight shipping deadlines and traffic rushed through me.

It’s true: everything seems to take longer once November rolls around. Grocery shopping, driving, running errands…I’ve learned that adding extra buffer time helps, but sometimes, no amount of planning can fully tame the chaos.

I wondered: How will I make space for quality time with family and friends while still handling responsibilities? How do I stay grounded and calm for my coaching clients while managing my own stress? What will help me celebrate and actually enjoy the moments?

That’s when I remembered my anchors—the practices that keep me steady when I feel like I’m caught in a storm.

Yoga classes help me breathe and move through tension
Walks outside give me a break from screens and a much-needed dose of nature
Connecting with friends for judgment-free conversation gives me energy and perspective—even from afar.
Escaping with an absorbing book like a juicy Romantasy novel gives me a reset.
Daily snuggles with my dog are the definition of calming.
Building strength through weight training has been empowering lately—I hope it’ll be a new anchor as the holidays ramp up.

Prioritizing these activities helps me weather the holiday storm and show up as my best self, for my family, friends, and coaching clients.

Finding Your Anchors

Think back: What practices or connections have helped you find your center before? Which would you like to draw on—or return to—throughout this season?

What helps you feel grounded when life gets busy?
Are there routines, hobbies, or little rituals that bring you comfort or spark a sense of joy? Maybe reading, listening to music, or a morning walk?
When emotions run high, do you find relief in a few deep breaths, stretching, or your favorite movement?
Who are the people that make you feel truly accepted and supported? How can you carve out time—even a quick text or call—to connect?

If ideas aren’t coming right away, don’t worry. I’ll be sharing all sorts of activities over the next few weeks that can serve as anchors during the holiday season.

This Week’s Challenge

I’d love to hear from you!

What are your anchors during tough times?

Leave me a comment and join the conversation!

Need Support?

If you’d like personalized strategies for peace and positivity this holiday season, email me at dianna@collierclan.net for a free consultation.